Does this sound familiar? It does me…from when I was 5. And I still remember exactly what ‘she’ said to me back then because, 41 years later, something so simple can trigger that same emotion. Yug, what an awful feeling.
What hurts us on the inside often affects us on the outside, or more pointedly, how we express ourselves to the outside world. Our communication both to ourselves and anyone in our path has been molded, affected, tainted and even corrupted by some of the things we heard as a kid.
To twist this up, our experiences are not only a direct correlation to what actually occurred or said but also what we made it mean, then and now. It’s like the game of telephone but with ourselves. Something was said or occurred. We made it mean something that fit how we felt about ourselves at that moment. Then we drag that meaning through history and viola, 41 years later, we have crafted an adult version of the childhood drama.
Healthy living should focus on these stories and we should clean out our mental closets every spring and fall. I know we are materialistic creatures and so many of us hate to throw things out but we need not be hoarders of our dusty baggage. When mental dampness sets in, which is inevitable at some point in our lives, our thoughts get stinky and moldy.
There is hope!
- Decide today that you are no longer going to cram any more junk down the sinkhole.
- Take stock of what is actually in there and record on a piece of paper what you want to get rid of.
- Write down where it came from.
- Write a thank you note (you don’t actually have to send it, just to get you some closure) to the person that helped you store it.
- Seal it and burn it. Have a ceremony if you will.
- Move on. That stuff will not be missed once it’s gone.
- Keep a record of how that stuff made you feel, so when you have a memory jolt, you can refer back to the ‘shit list’ and go ‘oh yeah, I so don’t need that in my life’.
- Open up a new closet in your new home for all the new, great stuff that’s coming your way and decorate it with all sorts of pretty colours and pictures (visuals to remind you of what you want, how great you are and what great things are to come for you)
- Share this closet with someone close to you.
- Have a party and invite only those love you and that includes yourself.
Healthy Living starts with a healthy intake of good mental stuff to keep you fit and moving. Getting a personal trainer isn’t a bad idea either.